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• /abort73

I was around 22 or 23 years old when I was persuaded by my boyfriend at the time to have an abortion. He came from a wealthy family living in New Canaan, CT. I was naive and believed him when he said my body would change and the it was the best decision. I was scared and uncertain, but eventually caved in and did it. I regret it every day, because the baby would have been financially set with my family and his. I feel like I murdered a life that was truly a blessing and deserved to live. That relationship eventually ended. I have been in many relationships, taking risks, which didn’t result in a pregnancy. I felt like I was being punished.

I am currently 39 and pregnant with my live-in boyfriend, whom has twins of his own—which I could better accept if I had my own child from the past.

I realize I was manipulated and wasn’t thinking properly back then. Of course my old, wealthy boyfriend didn’t want to disappoint his parents and be stuck with a child at that time.

I don’t know how to move on; I will always imagine that child getting older. I know my current pregnancy is a blessing, and I want to have as many kids as possible—to make up for what I did.

I can’t turn back time, but I hope others will think twice before doing what I did. I will never forget and will always remember and imagine what the child could have been and how he or she could have impacted my life and others.

Age: 39
Location: Stamford, CT
Date: June 26, 2019