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In August of 2003 I had an abortion. I grew up in church and thought I was a Christian. I never believed in abortions and said I would never get one. That all changed the day I found out I was pregnant. I was in college and 21 years old. The first thoughts that went through my head were "how am I going to tell my parents". I'm not sure why I thought that, other than I knew I would be ashamed. They would have been disappointed, but they would have continued to love me and would have helped me with the pregnancy. But I didn't go to my parents, I took the pregnancy test with a friend who had already had an abortion. She made it seem like it wouldn't be that bad and she didn't seem to be too regretful. Then I went to my boyfriend at the time, who I had been dating for about 2 years. He just cried and asked me to have an abortion. I think I just shut down my emotions and anything that I felt and just made the appointment and was there a week later. The clinic was small and I just felt wrong being there. I spoke with a counselor beforehand and I told her what I thought she wanted to hear. I was afraid if I was honest, she would know I didn't want to have an abortion. After having an ultrasound and learning that I was 10 1/2 weeks pregnant, I was placed on a cot with an IV and laid there for what felt like hours. I'm sure it was only a few hours, but it was the longest hours of my life. There were other girls in the room as well, but no one said a word and I looked at no one. I just laid there and cried. I was put under for the procedure, thank the Lord, but as soon as I awoke, the pain was overwhelming. Not so much physically, but the emotional realization that I just killed my baby. I "chose" to do this. I wish that I didn't have the "choice". I am now married and I hope to start a family in the near future, and most importantly, I am a true Christian, a follower of Jesus Christ. I realized that just because I grew up in church and believed in God, that that didn't save me. Only a life that reflects Christ and a person who has a relationship with God is saved. My life was obviously not that of a Christian. I even went so far as to kill my unborn child. I have been forgiven by Christ, but it is not so easy to forgive myself. Each day that I focus on the Bible and God's promises of forgiveness, it gets easier. There is hope in Christ for anyone who has had an abortion. He can and will forgive you for any sin if you turn to Him. I will never forget the worst day of my life and the worst decision I could ever make. I hope that my story will help at least one woman from enduring the pain and anguish that I have lived with for the past 7 years and will continue to live with for the rest of my life. If you are considering an abortion, do NOT do it. You will regret it and it will live with you forever. There is life in you and it is a baby, a human life from conception, no matter what people say to make you and themselves feel better about abortion. Abortion is murder of an unborn child.

Age: 29
Location: Kentucky
Date: January 25, 2011