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I am healing but will ALWAYS REGRET taking the lives of my children...

Abortion Story: San Diego, CA

Submitted to Abort73 by a 58-year-old woman on March 19, 2019

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For some reason #ShoutYourAbortion has become a popular hashtag on Twitter and so I decided to join the discussion with my #ShoutYourAbortion REGRET Story!!! Unfortunately, I've had three abortions.

REGRET #1: I was engaged at 17, got pregnant, and his mother told me what to do. She didn't ask me/us; she just said, “This is what you will do!” Needless to say, we didn't stay together. I proceeded to numb myself with drugs and alcohol.

REGRET #2: Nine years later, pregnant again, I thought, “I know what to do, I've done this before; it's legal right?” But it was a little harder this time to get up on that table and "remove a clump of cells,” or so I was told. I wondered why it was so hard this time. Maybe my conscious was waking up.

REGRET #3: Six months later, I'm pregnant again! I've done this before, it's legal right? But much harder this time! I asked the nurse and the doctor how they could be doing this; it didn't seem right! ”Just lay back and look at the ceiling.” I stared at two crossbeams—the cross of Christ. I ignored Him; He wasn’t allowed in my life at this time. How could He be after all that I had done? But my conscious was fully awake now! I had done horrible things in my life.

I soon met my husband to be, but I was ashamed of myself and would not let him love me. We started attending mass together and I began the RCIA classes. I was baptized and confirmed into the Catholic Church on March 25th—St. Dismas & The Annunciation Feast Days! All my sins washed away, but I had survivors’ guilt and punished myself for almost 30 years. It was very hard to bond with my children. A few years ago, I finally attended a post abortion healing retreat and found relief, but I had to tell my adult children my regret and shame and ask for their forgiveness! I am healing but will ALWAYS REGRET taking the lives of my children.

Age: 58
Location: San Diego, CA
Date: March 19, 2019

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