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• /abort73

What can I say? I not only made the wrong choice once but twice. I am in my early thirties with three kids and don’t have the balls to say it out loud. I kept it a secret. I only told a handful of people.

The first time I got pregnant, I’d just turned 17. He was young and athletic, like me, but we only dated to prove we belong together. We should never have dated. I remember being young and just knowing I was pregnant. I was too scared to take a test at home so I took it at Taco Bell. It came out positive. I was scarred sh--ess. My boyfriend at the time reassured me that he would take care of us. Stupid me. I remember going to work telling everyone that he wasn’t like the others. He is going to go to my parents and tell them he will take care of us. I was wrong. I wound up at the f-ing clinic.

The second time was with the same guy. He said he didn’t want to make the same mistake. Even though we were the same age, he graduated a year earlier. When I was pregnant again I was alone. I lost friends and my family treated me like an intruder. He wanted me to abort it again. I sat in the clinic by myself and walked out. I could not do this again. I ended up having her. It was rough. Many people treated me like sh-- not knowing I know their intent. 

A year later with the same guy, I was pregnant again. This time even after having our daughter and being out of high school and working, he wanted an abortion. He drove me, dropped me off, and left me. I remember the cruelty behind it. They made me listen to the heartbeat until it disappeared. Something he will never understand. From that day until now all I hear is, “get over it.” I’m older and divorced. I’m teaching my children not to ever treat or be treated like that. 

Age: 33
Location: Tucson, AZ
Date: November 6, 2020