Submitted to Abort73 by a 32-year-old woman on January 25, 2005.
I had an abortion when I was 16 years old without my parents knowing about it. I never got over it, the grief I felt through my life was unbearable, I had five more children to try and fill the void I was feeling, but it still didn't go away. If I didn't have an abortion my child would be 16yrs old this year, and even though I have 5 beautiful children I think about her every single day, I think about what she would have looked like, I cry for her... If I had seen this then I would have never had an abortion. I was never offered any counseling just given a date and told to turn up. In New Zealand where I live we just have to see our school counselor and they arrange it and they don't have to inform our parents, I was 16 for goodness sake. I had pressure from my boyfriend to get an abortion and he paid for it (think about it he paid someone to murder our child). My parents dropped me at school, I bused into town where I met my boyfriend, he drove me to the clinic, and then I had the abortion all whilst I was in my school uniform, went home and pretended that nothing ever happened!!! At the time I must of suffered some sort of Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome, I was just numb so numb..Looking at this website has in some way helped me to grieve my loss. My faith also helps me knowing that God has forgiven me and the fact that I will see my child in heaven keeps me going, although it has taken as long time and a lot of work on myself to get to this point. I held on to such guilt for so long. I am grateful that I can also use this website as a resource to inform other young ladies when they are contemplating abortion. Although the pictures are hard to take this is a very sad reality....
Date: January 25, 2005