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Afterwards I cried for days, and no one understood why I felt like I did—not even my boyfriend...

Abortion Story: London, UK

Submitted to Abort73 by a 21-year-old woman on August 20, 2016

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I had my abortion at the end of April. I was 9-weeks pregnant. I knew I was pregnant for over a month; I just didn't know what to do. It was the worst time of my life. I was at the end of my university year and couldn't do my exams. I couldn’t talk or do anything; I just stared into space. I got a scan done the day of the abortion, and she gave me the pictures of the baby. I looked at them and can't ever get that picture out of my mind. It was the most perfect baby I’ve seen causing my boyfriend and I to look at each other with uncertainty! Afterwards I cried for days, and no one understood why I felt like I did—not even my boyfriend. The connection you have when you have your baby inside you is indescribable. I felt so alone and, still, no one understands me! Three months later, I am a nanny to a 6-month old and 2-year old. I wish that I could do this with my own baby, weaning, changing, making them laugh. It does get easier, but when will the feeling of wanting this baby back go away? I don't think it ever will.

Age: 21
Location: London, UK
Date: August 20, 2016

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