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This will forever be my biggest regret... Day in and day out, I sit in my room and cry. Sobbing...

Abortion Story: St. Louis, MO

Submitted to Abort73 by a 19-year-old woman on August 31, 2015

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I chose to have an abortion. I chose to murder my children, and now I have to try and live with this. Every day. I grow more and more hopeless. The shadow of regret creeps upon me, and I feel it suffocating me. "I'm so sorry,” I cry. But it doesn't change anything. "Pray for forgiveness — you have to move on,” they say. Move on? Are you kidding me? I can't handle the way that I feel anymore. It's been five weeks and a day since the abortion, and things just feel worse and worse. I think about how I could have done things differently. Chosen to stand up and take responsibility but no. I ran away. This will forever be my biggest regret. I can't tell my family - they'll hate me. I can't tell my friends - they'll judge me. I only talk to my boyfriend about it. And we never seem to agree. He says, "Just pray.” But God doesn't listen to people like me. How can I go every day and act like I'm okay? Act like I didn't do something horrible and wrong? Day in and day out, I sit in my room and cry. Sobbing. On the floor silently. I can't get a handle on myself anymore. Tears pour out of my eyes and down my face. I'm sorry babies. I never told you good bye. Your mommy and daddy do love you.

Age: 19
Location: St. Louis, MO
Date: August 31, 2015

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