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I had an abortion when I was five weeks pregnant. When I found out I was pregnant, I was so happy and excited. When I told my boyfriend—who was a married man—he was shocked and didn’t believe me. I showed him the pregnancy test. He told me he was sick, had heart problems, needed surgery, and was going to die. This married man was like a dad to me. He protected me from anything bad. I didn't have anybody with me, not even a family member. I decided to have sex with him because he treated me like a queen. Please, don't judge me. Unlucky for me, I got pregnant for the first time by him. He told me that I couldn't have that baby—that I had to have an abortion because he was going to die and wouldn’t be there for his child. In my mind, I was thinking my mom got pregnant at almost the same time, but she didn't abort me. I was raised with only my mom. I never had a father. I met my father when I was 12 years old. I felt sad, and I was so mad at him. My boyfriend drove me to the clinic and said he couldn't go inside. The people know him. I said, “No, take me back home.” He was crying and shaking and saying I never loved him, and his family was going to hate him. I felt bad and actually went by myself. Inside, I asked how much the termination was after I signed a bunch of a papers. I told them, “I don't want to do it today; I'm coming back on Wednesday.” When I came back, my stomach was hurting so bad. I talked to the nurse. I didn't want to have the termination. She said, “It's your body, no one can tell you what to do.” I wish I had listened to the nurse. I wish I knew what abortion was. I wish I found out about the (Abort73) website before I did my termination. I thought it was nothing—with no regrets—like my boyfriend told me. Now I'm living with regrets. I cry almost every day. I want my baby back. Yesterday my boyfriend called to say he's not having the surgery. This hurts me more. My baby could have been nine weeks if it wasn't for him. I miss my baby. I want God to forgive my sins. I threw away his gift. I feel bad. I don't have anybody to talk to. I wish my baby was still inside my stomach:'(

Age: 23
Location: Miami, FL
Date: July 15, 2015