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I claim to love kids, but I killed my child. I keep thinking about the pain he must have suffered. I am in a living hell...

Abortion Story: Yonkers, NY

Submitted to Abort73 by a 45-year-old woman on June 10, 2014.

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I am a divorced mother of three. I have been struggling financially for a while. I felt torn and unsure of what to do (when I found out I was pregnant). At first, I was going to keep the baby, but I allowed other people to influence me and involved too many people. I kept hearing, "What about your other children? How are you going to raise another baby?" In the end, I had the abortion. My abortion made me think of every horrible thing I've done in my life. I claim to love kids, but I killed my child. I keep thinking about the pain he must have suffered. I am in a living hell. Taking the easy way out is no solution. I am left alone in my thoughts and severely depressed. Things in this world can be solved if you are still alive—adoption or financial assistance if you need it—but death is final. I know that God is angry with me, and I don't know if I am forgiven. I pray that other women seriously consider their life and what they could face after an abortion. All that talk about women's freedom to choose is just brainwashing. It is an empty, hateful road afterwards. I just read an article about faith. Life is the most precious gift we have. We are here thanks to our mothers. Don't all children deserve life? I am not the same. I am urging all women to use their experience to help spread the truth about abortion.

Age: 45
Location: Yonkers, NY
Date: June 10, 2014

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