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At age 16, I was married. A few years later I became involved with a married man. We had an affair that produced a daughter, which I passed off as my husband’s child. Our affair lasted 10 years, before my first marriage dissolved and I married this man. During those 10 years I had become pregnant four other times and all four times I aborted them.

It wasn’t long after we married that I became pregnant for the sixth time. Like the others, he pitched a fit and demanded of me that I get rid of this pregnancy too. So, I traveled to Atlanta. I was in my third trimester and Alabama wouldn’t allow an abortion that far along.

I entered the Atlanta abortion clinic. When you go into to these places, all they want to do is get you in and get your money. They sent me in to talk to this lady, and she was supposed to do all of this stuff. However when I met with her, it was the strangest thing. She told me all the things that they would do with my baby. She even showed me where they put the babies after they were aborted. She told me, "don’t do this!" She said, "go back to Alabama and have my baby." That’s what I did. I had a son.

Eventually I knew something was wrong with me. I couldn’t be at peace. There was a constant churning inside of me all the time.  I had so much rage that I just wanted to kill everybody. The anger, the rage, and my broken heart were unbearable. Trying to numb my anger and pain, I kept having other extramarital affairs, but I found no satisfaction in a man. I planned my suicide. I wrote letters to each one of my children about how sorry I was for committing suicide and that I loved them, but I just couldn’t take the pain anymore.

But God had a different plan! One day at the library I picked up a free, local Christian magazine. I ran across this article asking, "Do you need healing from your abortions?" There was a telephone number listed, and though I struggled, I called the number.

I am healed and able to forgive myself for murdering my children. I came to know our sweet, precious Savior and learned how amazing it is that He shed His blood for us. He, alone, can take you in His arms and wipe all the stains away.

Location: Millbrook, AL
Date: April 17, 2013