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I was 16 when I found out I was pregnant. I had a boyfriend, my first actually, and it just happened. When I told him, he got up and said good-bye. My parents were mortified and worried how it would make them look to have a pregnant 16 year old. They insisted I have an abortion. They told me that they would disown me if I didn't; they would kick me out, and make sure I had nothing, and prevent anyone from helping me in anyway. I don't know if I was stupid, naive or maybe that is what I wanted to believe. Either way, I believed them, I had no choice. I wanted my baby, I dreamed of reading to her, rocking her and singing to her (I always pictured a girl). My parents were extremely upset about the cost of the "procedure" but they made the appointment. The drive took 4 hours, I was numb. Once there, the nurses barely looked at me; I was so ashamed! The "procedure" took no longer than 10 minutes; I was about 16 weeks; afterwards I felt empty. It felt like my heart had been sucked out. I had a lump in my throat that would not go away, and is coming back now. Before we went home, my parents asked me how I felt, I said nothing. I said nothing for about 2 weeks. I had to go back for a "checkup." When I saw the building I started shaking. Once I got in the elevator I began sobbing uncontrollably. I did not stop, I could not stop. It went on for most of the 4 hour ride home. Few days go by that I do not think of my baby, how old she would be now, what she would look like. It is only God's grace that gets me through. Girls, Women: you have a choice. Every baby is a miracle from God, no matter the circumstance. It is only through Jesus Christ that I have finally and only recently been able to forgive myself for this selfish and evil act. I got pregnant again at 21, on purpose that time. At 6 months, my father told me I should abort it, that my boyfriend was no good. I was able to drive away that time, and I have found the grace and strength to forgive my parents through Jesus. I have two young boys now, and an amazing husband. God even blessed me with a stepson a couple of years younger than my daughter would have been! I cannot wait to meet my daughter in heaven, she will be there, she was alive! No matter how hard the situation seems, killing is never the answer, turn to God, rest in Jesus Christ and he WILL give you strength you never knew you could possibly have. Do Not Make Regrets Like I Have. I found out last month I am pregnant. God is good, maybe I will have a daughter in this life after all.

Age: 30
Location: Maine
Date: July 7, 2012