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• /abort73

Things were finally going great in my career, until I found myself feeling sick often: nausea and sleeplessness. My boyfriend was employed but struggling with needing a better job and feeling indifferent because I made more money than him. When I found out I was pregnant, he was extremely surprised and excited. I myself was nervous. Here I am with this great life, in a new big city and now pregnant, not married and about to have a child. At 31, I feel as though I am not a young girl anymore and should have been able to go through with it. Yet my boyfriend was immature and made me feel as though all the weight would be put on me once I had the baby. I awoke one morning and told him I was going to workout. I went to the clinic and had the abortion pill. That evening he had to work. Within 30 minutes of taking the 2nd pill, I wished I hadn't gone through with it. I was terribly sick, on a toilet, throwing up and cramping. The life I felt inside of me I had smothered hours earlier when I took the 1st pill. It was no longer felt as I sat on the toilet and my body went through the motions of miscarriage. Blotches of blood and pain were experienced and hours later it was over. I was such a coward. I told my boyfriend I miscarried. I wanted my child to have the best chance at life with a balance of mom and dad in a familiar home. I regret it because I know that I took my beautiful baby's life. If I get pregnant in the future, which I plan to, married or not, I will have my child. I can support my baby and if I have to do it alone, I will. I can't right the wrongs of my past by attempting to create a life I may never have, such as marriage and all that. I just know I now regret killing the life inside me, a gift from God, and I just threw away the gift.

Age: 31
Location: Woodbridge, VA
Date: October 29, 2011