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• /abort73

I'm 20 yrs old, almost 21, in a very stable relationship with a very loving partner. We live together and he has a good job, and I'm studying a uni degree. About 6 weeks ago, I found out I was pregnant. It was a constant struggle for me as I couldn't decide what to do. My parents would not have accepted it, and have hated me and disowned me. My partner supported whatever decision I wanted to make. In the end time was running out and I couldn't make the decision. So my partner said we shouldn't keep it, we can have a baby when it suits us. He made the appointment as I was unable to deal with it, and we went, but when we got there I couldn't do it. I cried hysterically and we ended up leaving. A few days later, we talked about it, and stupidly the few days leading up to the appointment, I had drank alot, so we were very concerned that the baby would have something wrong. He remade the appointment and I still cried like crazy. I screamed at the nurse and doctors, and eventually the anesthetic was given and I woke up and it was gone. I have never ever felt worse. I am not pro life or religious and always thought if I got into a situation like this I would know what to do.

A few days later, the first day my partner went back to work, the pain in my heart was so bad from what I had done, I took 2 sheets of heavy painkillers, probably about 15 washed down with vodka and I ended up in emergency, having to stay there for 2 days. It's now my first day back at home alone, and it still hurts more than anything. To anyone considering an abortion, if you're even considering the baby, keep it. I wish I had not let my parents influence my decision and had made it for myself. The pain is unbearable, and I hope at least one person reads this and decides to keep their baby. Because this pain, nothing will ever heal. It's always going to be a reminder. I don't think you could ever regret having a baby, but you will regret having an abortion.

Age: 20
Location: Sydney, Australia
Date: October 13, 2011