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I'm not particularly religious, but I think I will be judged—as I judge myself... Regret is a hard burden to bear...

Abortion Story: Kent

Submitted to Abort73 by a 49-year-old woman on April 7, 2016.

I was only 19 when I found out I was pregnant. My boyfriend, who was soon to be my husband, was a lot older than me. I was young and ambitious—a feminist—but was not using contraception. Looking back, I was naive and a bit of a sheep! I was so in love with this intelligent man and was led by his views. I let myself be compromised. I didn't want to have a child; I was young, a pioneer, and not a mum type. I was an artist! And pregnant, bugger!  Against my family's views, I opted for an abortion, 29 years ago. It wasn't quite as easy then as it is now. My doctor was a Catholic and was dead set against it. Consequently, I was 24 weeks before I had my D&C. I now understand what that really means! This was a viable baby.

I'm nearly 50 now. I wish so much that I had had my little girl. I struggle to know how I will be forgiven for giving up such an amazing gift. I'm not particularly religious, but I think I will be judged—as I judge myself. No woman should feel judged for this decision, but you may be your own jury!!!! Regret is a hard burden to bear. I have an amazing son who has brought me so much happiness. Surprisingly, I think I have been a good mum. Now I can't wait for grand babies. Think hard; today is fleeting, and there is a lifetime to live with your decisions. I forgive myself. I was young and uninformed, but today I would choose differently!

Age: 49
Location: Kent
Date: April 7, 2016

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