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I’m constantly looking up pictures of what my baby would have looked like right now if I had kept  him or her...

Abortion Story: New Zealand

Submitted to Abort73 by a 24-year-old woman on March 23, 2017.

I found out I was pregnant at five weeks. I've always loved babies, and I love my boyfriend—although we've only been together for less than a year. But I let my fear get the best of me. I convinced myself I wasn't ready, although deep down I knew I would be okay. My boyfriend and I agreed to end the pregnancy. I had my abortion at 11 weeks, 2 days, on the 7th of February, 2017. I waited over a month after finding out because I struggled. But I did it, and it is the worst decision I've ever made, I wish I walked out of the hospital that morning. I took my baby home with me to bury and that just deepened my pain—but I don’t regret that. I cry and I get angry a lot. It’s a huge thing to hold on your shoulders. I’m constantly looking up pictures of what my baby would have looked like right now if I had kept him or her. Nothing has ever hurt me this bad; I feel so stupid. I wish I could turn back the clock. BE SURE ABORTION IS WHAT YOU WANT. Don't let the pressure get to you. Ugh. It just sucks so bad, thinking about my little baby all the time.

Age: 24
Location: New Zealand
Date: March 23, 2017

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