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Abortion Story: Madison, CT

Submitted to Abort73 by a 40-year-old woman on January 9, 2014.

My story...I was in high school...I think about 16...funny how details like my age I don't remember, but the details I wish I could forget are never going to be fuzzy...cheerleader...a kind boyfriend...seemed my parents and older siblings were known by just about everyone in town...I was the youngest...the smart student with tons of potential...social but not a partyer...a wanna be rebel...sneaking cigarettes and sex...had 2 abortions...don’t know which was which; it all just blends into an awful dark shadow on my teenage life...I remember the lady at the clinic telling me I was past the 12 week deadline after feeling my belly...I think I begged and convinced them it was only a few days; what's the difference?…I was already there and had the money...I came home after...lied about where I had been...couldn't hide the pain...lied and said I had period cramps...something was wrong...went upstairs to sit on the toilet...crying as quiet as I could so I wouldn't get caught...then massive cramping...then a plop...what was that?...I looked and saw something that changed my life forever...wait, what?...that looks like tiny fingers...and ribs...is that an eye?...don't they check their trash to make sure they got it all?!?...did they check?...I have since come to believe there may have been twins and I was looking at #2, without #1...they sent me home not knowing he job wasn’t done...my first labor and delivery was to a mutilated fetus...I had killed...I tried so hard to convince myself it was just a blood clot...it wasn't...I couldn't flush...I scooped it out and kept it under my bed in a box...sobbing in shock and disbelief every day...until I didn't want to get caught...and it was dried up...I saw what I allowed...I asked for that...because my parents wouldn't understand...I didn't tell them what happened until last year...sobbing as if it happened the week before...I was 39...mother of 3...wanting to die...it followed me all the years...I didn't know it though...I never thought about it...it was someone else's story not mine...couldn't be...but it was...it is.

Age: 40
Location: Madison, CT
Date: January 9, 2014

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